Papa Barman's Hummus and Pita

(note: not edited so you get the full impact of Barman's foul mouth)

Here's my dad's hummus recipe and the pita recipe I used. The measurements for the hummus are a little archaic and if you use fresh chickpeas as opposed to canned like I did then you have to do most of it by taste. The ratio of chickpeas to tahini is around 2:1.

1/2 a can of tahini
2 cans of chickpeas
2-4 cloves fresh garlic
1-2 lemons (juice)
salt to taste

Pour the full can of tahini into a blender and mix well, pour half back. Add chickpeas and blend well until smooth, adding some of the chickpea water as needed for a paste-like consistnecy. Mince garlic and blend, keep in mind that the garlic will be stronger as it has time to sit in the humus, so if it's going to sit overnight use a little less than you think you want. Add and mix the juice of 1-2 lemmons to taste. Salt to taste. Rub it all over your naked chest and enjoy ;-)


Pita (12 pitas)

1pk yeast (scant tblsp)
3-4 cups all purpose or whole-wheat flour
1 tbl olive oil
1 tsp salt
1 1/2 cup warm water

Mix yeast with warm water in a large mixing bowl until yeast is dissolved. Add the oil and salt and mix well. Add and stir in flour aboout 1/2 a cup at a time until it becomes difficult to stir and the mixture becomes doughy like a drunken fat girl's ass after a frat party.

Turn the dough onto a floured surface and knead well for 10 min adding flour as necessary to make a firm, elastic dough (you can also use a food processor or mixer w/ a dough hook). Place the dough in a grease bowl and cover for about 1 1/2 or until the dough doubles in size.

Turn dough onto floured surface and cut into 12 equal peices. Using hands roll peices into a ball about the size of a ping-pong ball on steriods, cover them with a towel and let sit for 5 min.

Using a rolling pin or some other long, hard, cylindrical object, roll each ball firmly into a 6" flat circle (do this on a floured surface). Cover the discs with a towel and let sit for 15 min. During this time, preheat your oven and backing stone, tiles, or cookie sheets to 500 degrees.

Frisbee-golf your pita discs into the oven and bake for 3 min. Now you've got some motha fuckin' pita beatch!